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Would like the board's opinion on my current situation...

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Would like the board's opinion on my current situation...

Unread postby Oneaboveall » Sat 13 Aug 2011, 21:20:01

Ludi was pretty open about her bouts with depression and one member here posted a thread dealing with his feeling that his life was pretty pointless. In that vein, I would like to solicit advise from the members here. I'm not sure of this is the right forum, but here goes anyway...

There are some frighteningly knowledgeable and intelligent people posting on here with some pretty impressive backgrounds (I believe Cid Yama worked for the State Department). Unfortunately, the level of discourse has really dropped off. I've been lurking on here since 2009 and I've noticed a lot more sniping and insults; so I'm expecting to get some of that as well.

I'll start off with some background: I come from a pretty dysfunctional family; abusive alcoholic father foremost of many aforementioned dysfunctions. I also grew up in Newark, NJ, which has a national reputation as being a dysfunctional urban area (a hellhole to be blunt, even though I grew up in the working-class white "Ironbound" section). From that background, I rose to graduate college a few years back and worked as substitute in Jersey City and a teacher in Newark. Thing is I started to get really burned out in Newark. I managed to get transferred to the high school Down-Neck after my third year and; after being threatened there more times than I was uptown and having a confrontation with a bullying supervisor, I realised that teaching might not be for me. I decided to make a radical change in life (inspired by a cousin who moved from Jersey City to Kent, Ohio) and moved to Carlisle, PA to attend Shippensburg University in 2005 to obtain a graduate degree in history. I was convinced to take a leave of absense instead of quitting Newark, so I had the option to return. While I was there, I substituted in a few local districts and learned a few things: Newark isn't the only place with problems, middle-class white kids can be disrespectful too, people in small towns can be REALLY cliquey & petty, and (some) small towns refuse to acknowledge that they have have problems.

After dealing with one of those aforementioned petty people (I wrote up a kid whose parent worked for the district. After that, I didn't know how to do my job anymore), I made the decision to go back to Newark in 2007. Only to find that my bullying supervisor from a few years back had been promoted and I was going to be assigned to his building. I stuck it out, but the place seemed worse than when I had left. I finally resigned and pursued a second master's in Library and Information science from Clarion University from 2008-2010.

That brings me to my current situation. I graduated in May 2010 and haven't been able to find a job since. I've had two interviews in that time. I had my car repoed and had to move back in with mom (at 38, yeesh!). I tried to do the honorable thing and sell off my toy and comic collection (my small indulgence of mindless consumerism), but I obviously haven't made that much money with the economy being the way it is and will most likely stay (and get worse with resource depletion). Given that I feel like I'm at the end of my rope, what do you all think is a reasonable course of action?
When the banksters want something, our policymakers move with the speed of Mercury and the determination of Ares. It’s only when the rest of us need something that there is paralysis.
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Re: Would like the board's opinion on my current situation..

Unread postby RedStateGreen » Sat 13 Aug 2011, 21:33:01

I don't know you, or your mom, but you might be an asset to her depending on the situation. Do the repairs, do the yardwork, put in a food garden, sell anything you don't need and think seriously about what your community needs that you can provide.

For too long, people (in general, not picking on you) have had the mindset that someone will give them a job. One transition I see coming is the return of people making their own way in life. To do that, you match what is needed with what you can/are willing to do.

Some things I can think of off the top of my head: a consultant to homeschooling parents in your area, an online freelance researcher (business people in particular will pay a lot to have someone do research for them), start a charter school ... those are just a few things you can do with your training. On deeper study you might find there are other things that you'd rather do. My training is in medicine, but I really love food and gardening, which is why I started an online business that combined the two. (long story as to why I'm not in medical practice)

But first you need to get on your feet. Once you are feeling productive, I think the down feelings will improve. If they don't you should see a doctor. A short course of medication can do wonders if you have a clinical depression going.

Good luck :)
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Re: Would like the board's opinion on my current situation..

Unread postby peeker01 » Sat 13 Aug 2011, 21:37:44

What are your interests?
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Re: Would like the board's opinion on my current situation..

Unread postby jedrider » Sat 13 Aug 2011, 21:46:10

Perhaps, stop going to school. You will soon be overqualified for most every job! Not really serious about that suggestion, but it does seem to me you have to find a passion in life, something you can't just get from going to a school and taking classes unless you are lucky to find a career that's just made for you.
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Re: Would like the board's opinion on my current situation..

Unread postby Oneaboveall » Sat 13 Aug 2011, 21:50:51

peeker01 wrote:What are your interests?

My interests include politics, history, music, comics, toys, and other stuff. I've also done stuff like this to keep myself busy:

Image
Action Man Weapon Test by oneaboveall23, on Flickr
When the banksters want something, our policymakers move with the speed of Mercury and the determination of Ares. It’s only when the rest of us need something that there is paralysis.
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Re: Would like the board's opinion on my current situation..

Unread postby Oneaboveall » Sat 13 Aug 2011, 21:54:25

jedrider wrote:Perhaps, stop going to school. You will soon be overqualified for most every job! Not really serious about that suggestion, but it does seem to me you have to find a passion in life, something you can't just get from going to a school and taking classes unless you are lucky to find a career that's just made for you.

Well, my ultimate goal was to get into a college library. I think it would be a much better environment (as opposed to a place where they thought the word "Pogram" was a mispelling of the word "program"). Thing is most want 10-15yrs experience and the ability to speak French, Farsai, and one dead language. 8O
When the banksters want something, our policymakers move with the speed of Mercury and the determination of Ares. It’s only when the rest of us need something that there is paralysis.
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Re: Would like the board's opinion on my current situation..

Unread postby americandream » Sat 13 Aug 2011, 21:54:53

Bullying and being generally pushed around seems to feature quite prominently in your woes. Perhaps retraining in a skill/craft/profession/employment that enables you to enjoy more room in terms of self-direction...some form of self-employment perhaps.

Good luck.
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Re: Would like the board's opinion on my current situation..

Unread postby Oneaboveall » Sat 13 Aug 2011, 22:05:34

americandream wrote:Bullying and being generally pushed around seems to feature quite prominently in your woes. Perhaps retraining in a skill/craft/profession/employment that enables you to enjoy more room in terms of self-direction...some form of self-employment perhaps.

Good luck.

Hmmm... That has actually happened a lot. Not sure what kind of cues (nonverbal or otherwise) that I'm giving off. Of course, if you look at cases around the country, there are lots of teachers getting "in trouble" or fired for the most trivial of reasons. Never mind that a substitute has even less options to protect themselves from a petty vindictive administrator.
When the banksters want something, our policymakers move with the speed of Mercury and the determination of Ares. It’s only when the rest of us need something that there is paralysis.
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Re: Would like the board's opinion on my current situation..

Unread postby peeker01 » Sat 13 Aug 2011, 22:08:45

If you are asking, and I think you are, I would start my own business. You have a variety of
interests and are a trained teacher. You could tutor school kids, teach music, teach art. I think
there is going to be a large market for property managers as investors buy up foreclosures. Buy
a few rentals yourself. Start a business that helps seniors with their home maintenance. You
might have to work part time until you get your business going, but I think if you follow your
interests you will succeed.
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Re: Would like the board's opinion on my current situation..

Unread postby dazoline » Sat 13 Aug 2011, 22:11:10

Oneaboveall wrote: ...and pursued a second master's in Library and Information science from Clarion University from 2008-2010.


The Library Science line caught my attention.

I'm not sure how you feel about technology but on-line search engines need to function by using classification and keywords based on... you guessed it Library Science techniques. Working in the web content management industry I've met a few people with the same degree working on developing metadata for companies search engines. If tech is something you could see yourself getting into, it maybe worth it to research how you could leverage your degree in this area.
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Re: Would like the board's opinion on my current situation..

Unread postby Sixstrings » Sat 13 Aug 2011, 22:42:33

Oneaboveall wrote:Given that I feel like I'm at the end of my rope, what do you all think is a reasonable course of action?


Well first of all, you have to determine to be a Survivor. We talk about World Made By Hand Mad Max The Road Doom on this forum, I assume you want to be a Survivor no matter what happens even if it comes down to #10 cans. So that goes for surviving this economic Depression too.

Know that you're not alone. People aren't talking about it, but in my own family one by one they're falling into unemployment or can't find a job. I have a family member who just gave up and he is a house husband -- no shame in that, he takes care of his daughter, but it's hard for a man for the wife to work but not him. He used to work construction, he just can't find anything.

Another family member was laid of from a utility -- high pay, nice severance. He's not even looking for a job, he's enjoying the unemployment comp to the last. I wonder what he'll do though.. the severance will run out, and I really doubt he can find anything more than 1/3 of what he was making before.

The advantage you have over these guys is at least you hold several degrees -- a bachelors and two masters.

Bottom line, we are in an economic Depression. It will only get worse. You may have to take a job that you don't like, with a bullying supervisor, and just suck it up and put up with it no matter how much you hate it. How bad is it for teaching jobs out there? Perhaps if you're willing to relocate you could find a teaching job in another state. I would think a teacher should be able to find a job somewhere in another state. Some states are doing better by the way, like North Dakota. Alaska seems to need people. Texas maybe. It may come down to that, being willing to radically relocate.

If you have friends or relatives in other states, you could try couch surfing for a while to see if you can find work in a new area. About teaching, have you thought of private schools? Might be more laid back, less stress, respectful students. Also maybe something like a Sylvan Learning Center (tutoring).

Another option, hard as it is, would be to downgrade. Something like a McDonalds manager, if it's corporate, isn't too bad -- decent money, company car, company stock. Just a bachelors degree can get you into retail management.. yeah it sucks teaching is easier, but a management position can at least pay a livable wage and that's your goal here -- survival, even if that means giving up professional work. So that may be something to consider, even something like a call center -- if it's management you may get ulcers but at least it's a decent living. Your degrees give you an advantage here.

You could retrain for a trade -- plumber, nursing, etc.

Or go back to school again if more student loans are an option. I think engineering graduates are in demand.

If all else fails you could get really radical and just go teach English in a foreign country for a while.

You could try interning somewhere -- I see lots of articles about people older than you being "interns."

The military is an option, even at your age. I *think* the Army is recruiting up to age 41 now. With your degrees, an officer program should be available to you.

Lastly, it just comes down to being flexible. There was a new member who posted in the welcome thread, it was really interesting all the fields he's worked in from professional to retraining for nursing later in life and now he's into winemaking.

I don't know what to say other than that, just be a Survivor and if you ever do get "to the end of your rope" then reach out to somebody and let them know, talk it out, get support.
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Re: Would like the board's opinion on my current situation..

Unread postby midnight-gamer » Sat 13 Aug 2011, 22:52:41

I've seen my fair share of this.
Only to find that my bullying supervisor from a few years back had been promoted and I was going to be assigned to his building.


The only thing I can suggest is a combination of persistence, hard work and luck!
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Re: Would like the board's opinion on my current situation..

Unread postby SeaGypsy » Sat 13 Aug 2011, 23:27:36

Do you put all that stuff on your resume'? If so, knock it off. Most people don't want to have Mr/s Cleverdick in their team. Every time you apply for a job, do a quick rewrite and keep on topic. Less is more in this circumstance.

Another factor is your negativity about your work experience so far; this is seriously problematic. So is allowing yourself to become 'long term unemployed' is a really unfortunate position, especially if a potential employer can construe you walked out of your last job. (whatever the reason)
.
If all life gives you is potatoes, learn how to make chips. Being a 'job snob' is not a good look in a gen y prospect. I am an undergraduate student, tutoring 1/1 or 1/2 mostly with teenagers with fairly serious ADD/ ADHD. The University I work at hired me based on my experience with delinquent kids/ families in remote disability/ aged care work. I won a national award for remote nursing proactive preventative medicine last year. I make equivalent $30USD an hour on weekdays and I never finished High School.

My 10cents, go back to the ratbag kids and work it out. I work with highly specialised teachers and specificly problematic groups, often state wards. The classes can be made very enjoyable if the curriculum can allow time for free and creative expression/ communication. Man it sure beats being unemployed!

Edit/ my current resume doesn't mention the 15 years I worked in the arts, stage and set design/ glass arts/ aboriginal arts, my many travels etc. At 44 nobody wants to read my life story in a job application.
Last edited by SeaGypsy on Sat 13 Aug 2011, 23:39:52, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Would like the board's opinion on my current situation..

Unread postby Sixstrings » Sat 13 Aug 2011, 23:38:46

SeaGypsy wrote:I make equivalent $30USD an hour on weekdays and I never finished High School.


Good advice SG, but don't be too hard on him -- you may not realize how desperate the jobs situation is in the States. We're not creating enough jobs for even pop increase anymore. A majority of the jobs we are creating are part time low wage -- like $7 - $10 an hour. Texas alone accounts for 40% of all our new job growth since 2009 -- and these are low wage jobs at that.

Oneaboveall doesn't live in Texas, so he doesn't even have a vibrant McJob economy to find a part time job in.

Overall I agree with you just remember it's desperate in the US; whereas you have a fantastic economy in Australia. Every job idea I listed above has many applicants for each opening. I posted an article about a Walmart job hiring -- I think over a thousand in-person applicants for just 300 openings. The ratio is like that in field after field.

Now the post office is going to lay off 120,000. It just gets worse and worse, wait until the Tea Party forces cutbacks then we'll be really talking Depression.
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Re: Would like the board's opinion on my current situation..

Unread postby SeaGypsy » Sat 13 Aug 2011, 23:46:00

The numbers are misleading here, depite 5% unemployment a lot of 'qualified' people are not finding work, especially those not prepared to leave a large city, or take on any nitty gritty work.
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Re: Would like the board's opinion on my current situation..

Unread postby Serial_Worrier » Sat 13 Aug 2011, 23:54:21

SeaGypsy wrote:The numbers are misleading here, depite 5% unemployment a lot of 'qualified' people are not finding work, especially those not prepared to leave a large city, or take on any nitty gritty work.


As long as they can collect welfare & Medicaid, they will not do any "nitty gritty work".
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Re: Would like the board's opinion on my current situation..

Unread postby Oneaboveall » Sun 14 Aug 2011, 00:09:37

Sixstrings wrote: How bad is it for teaching jobs out there? Perhaps if you're willing to relocate you could find a teaching job in another state. I would think a teacher should be able to find a job somewhere in another state. Some states are doing better by the way, like North Dakota. Alaska seems to need people. Texas maybe. It may come down to that, being willing to radically relocate.

I asked for advice, but there are two things I have to address here.

There is absolutely no way I'm going back to teaching. It's a profession that seems to attract the most piety people to it like moths to a flame. I don't want to sound like a misogynist, but it's a profession dominated by women and I couldn't help notice that most of the problems I've had there were instigated by women (e.g. going back and telling an administrator about something minor thing wrong I did and then turning it into a big deal). I also am kind of reluctant to leave Newark just yet. Mom turns 68 in September and she just had eye surgery. She might have to have surgery on the other eye soon. We are kind of lucky in that we had three generations living within four blocks of each other. My aunt, and two uncles live near mom, but they're all older than she is. So it fell to me to take here to the hospital and take care of her until she was better.

If you have friends or relatives in other states, you could try couch surfing for a while to see if you can find work in a new area. About teaching, have you thought of private schools? Might be more laid back, less stress, respectful students. Also maybe something like a Sylvan Learning Center (tutoring)...


Ok. That's another thing. I used to be the guy who helped everyone out, when I needed something, no one was around. I've had a lot of people that I thought were friends, but weren't around when it really mattered.

Let me give you an example, just bear with me here:

Before I left Carlisle in 2007, I was subbing in four area districts: Mechanicsburg, Cumberland Valley, South Middleton, and Northern York. It was steady and I even got a job teaching Summer-school in South Middleton that July. Keep this in mind, as it plays a part later.

Back in December of 2009, I visited Carlisle after the semester ended at Clarion to see some friends and spend the evening with my friend's daughter (Some of you remember that I mentioned a rather unique mother and daughter that I'm friends with. Mom was working, so it was just the two of us). The daughter and I had just finished dinner and were about to hit a movie when she got a text. I drove her back home and it turned out that her great-grandmother had been rushed to the hospital. The mom shows up and everyone plans to head over to the hospital with her mother. The daughter froze after her mom asked if she wanted to come and kept looking at the ground. I figured the best thing at that point was for me to get out of the way and go back to the hotel. It was at this point that the mother stops me and says the following:

Mother: Could you stay with my daughter for a while?
Me: With all this going on, I don't want her to think she has to entertain me.
Mother: Well, it's best that someone stays with her instead of her sitting here by herself.

I agreed and wound up sitting up watching videos with the daughter until roughly two in the morning. I also stopped by the next afternoon to see how thing were going. I went back to NJ later that evening.

Flash-forward to the next March when I visited Carlisle again. I realised that I wasn't going to have a job after graduating Clarion and decided that subbing in the area again might be a good Plan-B. It was steady and would at least put money in my pocket. I explained my situation to the family I was friends with and asked if I could rent a room (or even a couch) from them. I wasn't asking for a handout and offered to pay them for a month. I also told them I would leave if subbing wasn't as steady as it was before. I was told they didn't have any room. I know it was a big favor to ask and it defeats the purpose of helping people out if you expect something from it, but it would be nice if a friend helped me out when I needed it.
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Re: Would like the board's opinion on my current situation..

Unread postby Sixstrings » Sun 14 Aug 2011, 00:10:27

SeaGypsy wrote:The numbers are misleading here, depite 5% unemployment a lot of 'qualified' people are not finding work, especially those not prepared to leave a large city, or take on any nitty gritty work.


Yeah but guess what CNA jobs pay where I live.. $10 an hour, I'm not joking. We have people actually going to school for jobs that don't pay any more than Burger King. According to Wikipedia, the minimum wage in Australia is $15 an hour. It's another world you're living in down there. Try to imagine former professionals desperate to find even $8 per hour jobs, 20 hours a week. Now try to imagine how a person can live on that.

Anyhow don't mean to argue with you, you have good points.. (1) it's critical he get some kind of employment because companies aren't hiring the jobless (they want to see that you're already employed, odd as that sounds). (2) if the issue is he just doesn't like teaching, well, he may need to figure out how to tolerate it.
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Re: Would like the board's opinion on my current situation..

Unread postby Shaved Monkey » Sun 14 Aug 2011, 00:24:06

Serial_Worrier wrote:
SeaGypsy wrote:The numbers are misleading here, depite 5% unemployment a lot of 'qualified' people are not finding work, especially those not prepared to leave a large city, or take on any nitty gritty work.


As long as they can collect welfare & Medicaid, they will not do any "nitty gritty work".


This isn't the 3rd world here,slave labour was never part of our history.
We import people from the 3rd world to do the stuff the rest of us don't want to do, just like every first world country does(did).The contract was you step up to the next level(very small steps) and new poor guy comes to fill your role.
Unfortunately in the new world with privatisation of government businesses, shipping manufacturing to China and automation of repetitive low skill work, the barely moving conveyor belt of social climbing has come to a stop.
PS
Americans would starve if illegal Mexicans didn't do the work the rest didn't want to do and you guys don't have half the safety nets most civilised western countries take for granted.
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Re: Would like the board's opinion on my current situation..

Unread postby Sixstrings » Sun 14 Aug 2011, 00:49:21

Oneaboveall wrote:There is absolutely no way I'm going back to teaching. It's a profession that seems to attract the most piety people to it like moths to a flame.


My brother in law is a teacher. I've been hearing him complain about being a teacher for 20 years now. So while I've never been a teacher I feel like I know something about it. :lol:

From what I can gather, he has no clue how brutal, tough, and abusive the private sector is. You may want to rethink things before it comes down to taking a working class job -- whatever abuse school administrators hand out may pale in comparison to what you could go through at something like a Walmart job. Plus corporations are utterly heartless, whatever level you are. It's very different from public sector.

Honestly man it seems to me teaching is a cushy job. You asked for advice, well you've been out of work for a while now. You will eventually have to take some kind of job, be aware there are rougher jobs than teaching.

I don't want to sound like a misogynist, but it's a profession dominated by women and I couldn't help notice that most of the problems I've had there were instigated by women (e.g. going back and telling an administrator about something minor thing wrong I did and then turning it into a big deal).


Well.. I dunno, you have to figure out how to get along with women not really any way around that. :lol:

I don't know what to tell you One, other than that the jobs / employment situation is brutal. If you want to survive you're going to have to re-adjust your expectations and realize most people don't like their boss and most people are miserable in their jobs. Pick your poison whatever it is, but get working.

If you just need some cash coming in but don't want to be seen working at a Walmart or something, here's an option:

http://www.alpineaccess.com

It's work-from-home call center work. Low pay, but it's more than zero pay. They hire you as a regular employee, health insurance, not a private contractor thing. You've got to do something so you can at least say you are currently employed as you apply for jobs.

Ok. That's another thing. I used to be the guy who helped everyone out, when I needed something, no one was around. I've had a lot of people that I thought were friends, but weren't around when it really


Yeah I guess that's true. On the bright side, you're not facing homelessness. You have several college degrees. So remember that, you have some advantages others don't.

Good luck man, try to get working at something even if it's "beneath" you, it's important just to get out there and get some pay and that can lead to something better. I've taken crappy jobs before and it actually motivated me to find something better.

(p.s. let us know if you're seriously depressed; getting advice on this forum isn't exactly good for depression, doomers are rough :lol: )
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